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I Don't Want One I Don't Like!

Writer's picture: Julie SchniersJulie Schniers

It's the day before we leave for church camp, and we are trying to find outfits that fit the everyday theme (the last minute seems to be how we function these days). The first day of camp is a superhero theme. I honestly figured we had something in our closest that would fit this, but of course, we did not. So here we are, making our way through Target, crossing our fingers, and trying to agree on a shirt option in this one-hour window we have to make it work. We absolutely did find some options that I thought would be fine. We had a Captain America, Flash, a variation of heroes on a black shirt in the boy's section, and a Disney princess theme that said something about being a girl who writes her own story. Aside from the fact that she didn't know who Captain America and Flash were, I thought we had found the one when we dug up the last Disney princess shirt in her size! It was purple (her favorite color), it had a girl-power type message (YES!), she knew who these princesses were (score!), and it wasn't in the boy's section!!! However, it had sequins on the sleeves, and at that moment, I learned we had outgrown that style. I also learned that those princesses were not her hero.


I said, "B, it is just a theme! We need a shirt. Can we just pick one of the few options we have found?" At this point, we have spent our time trying to get together all of the last-minute camp items and walked the store the three times it took to find the options she was wholeheartedly rejecting! I was going to lose my mind, but she was not going to budge.


The conversation went something like...

"Do you even have a hero? What could we possibly be looking for?"

"Well, Jesus would be more of my kind of hero, Mom."

"Good answer kid, BUT there is not a shirt in this place to fit that, and we are out of time to look. What do you want to do?"

"We can just make one! I'm not wearing these shirts. They aren't my hero."

"You understand that making a shirt is going to be me and some fabric pens, right?"

"That is what I want! It will be great. I just don't want one I don't like."

At this moment, I realize I am really, REALLY proud of her for more than one reason.

1.) I love that she loves Jesus!

2.) I love that she was not willing just to take what she could find.

3.) I love that she was willing to use what we had to make her dream of a better shirt happen.



WOW! What an impactful Target trip. You know what else? I was frustrated for the first 45 minutes. Every single option we found was not what she wanted, and she was not going to settle. In my hustle of trying to check all the boxes, I encouraged her to settle! Ouch! I know we are just talking about a dress-up shirt here, but writing that still stings a little. The truth is (this hurts a little too), I tend to settle. I sometimes give up on what I want because it's easier than fighting for it. If there was ever a lesson I hoped to teach my daughter, it was NOT TO SETTLE because you deserve it all! Don't give up on what you know you deserve and want. Don't accept convincing from anyone who isn't willing to help you on the path of not settling.


Yet here we are in Target, and she is the one teaching me. I guess that's how it goes sometimes. I am so proud of who she is. I pray I can be the kind of mom that teaches my kids to follow their dreams, fight for what they want, and never settle. I'll keep working on that and taking tips from my daughter.


Way to not settle, sweet girl! Keep teaching everyone in your path the way you teach me!

xoxoxo, Mom


P.S. The fabric markers were dry, so we had to roll with a sharpie. Guess what? She LOVED IT! Like "giddy over this sharpie-made shirt" loved it.

P.P.S. The camp was canceled as soon as I finished the shirt due to a COVID outbreak, so there's that too. I am thankful for this sweet lesson, but COVID, I hate you.


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